cause I'm the chosen one, rockgods chose me to be the next generation.

BEFORE YOU PROCEED, PLEASE READ THROUGH DISCLAIMER

DISCLAIMER

this is my
sickass blog.
and i dont think you can handle it.

blog may cause deafening
word of advice, turn off your speakers.
this blog's an amplifier
i think it amplifies music.

any resemblance to real persons,
living or dead is purely coincidental.

batteries not included.

Use only in well-ventilated area.

Keep away from fire or flame.

No fur-bearing animals were harmed
during the creation of this blog.

Disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes, or other acts of God, neglect, damage from improper use, incorrect line voltage, unauthorized use, unauthorized repair, improper installation, typos, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof,broken glass, disk failure, accidental file deletions, mud slides, forest fire, hitting of a deer, milk coming out of your nose due to laughing while drinking, or projectiles, which can include, but are not limited to, arrows, bullet shots, BBs, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.

oh, and one last thing..
NO SMOKING ALLOWED

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Heyy, Guess who's back, back again, Soapy's back, tell a friend. Guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back, guess who's back..
haha, yes I'm, back, and I'm safe, back in Singapore, thank God. All flights were cancelled in Thailand, and the airport was closed.. blame them bloody no life protesters.. So like there was no freggin way to get out of Thailand.. Uncle Tony called the Royal Thai Navy, and they hitched us a real long ride back to the lil red dot.. YES, we had to bus all the way back from Thailand.. Bus ride was about 2 days long.. I couldn't sleep.. Someone was snoring.. Wen and Jeryl kept bugging me for Guitar hero... So annoying.. And they sat like right infront of me.. Javin was a real pain in the butt.. sheesh, that lil brat.. He sat like opposite side.. Damn, I almost died.. HAHA, ohoh, I couldn't sleep, so I was like watching everyone.. HAHA, freaking retarded.. HAHA, Wen kept going into Jeryl's territory, HAHA, freaking retarded. HAHA, Javin was drooling. So I stayed up all night.. Next morn, they woke up.. and I was like a zombie.. Then the rest of the trip was boring.. Oh, we did have KFC for lunch.. Ohyeah, the freaking bus was damn cold okay..

So anyway, enough about tha bus ride,I needa blog bout something way more important, Okay, so how should I begin.. Okay, I hate Thailand, wait, no, I'm not complaining.. Just hear me out kayy, so yeah, I hate Thailand, cause it brings chaos in me.. See, I know I always appear really happy, and retarded, or sometimes, cold and heartless.. But idk, okay, first of all, I feel okay blogging bout this here, cause only close friends know this blog, and some of you already know.. So, yeah, most of you guys know I'm not really that cold hearted, and hateful, and heartless.. Its just something, I want everyone to think of me, that I stand my ground, I'm no longer that push over.. Honestly, I hate trying to be mean, and cold.. Its just not soap by nature.. The real soap is still that retarded, goofy kid, the one you guys see. I know that even though you guys are my close friends, you have this initial thought, that I'm a real bitch, HAHA, remember the times when we hang out in town, and if someone who roughly knows me comes up to us? I act coldly to that person? And like the other times.. yeah, I still remember, all you guys had the same reaction, as in reaction from different cliques, and friends whom I hang out with at different occasions.. Like, after the person leaves, you guys will be like 'geez soap, you're damn mean' or 'wth was that all about' HAHA, come on man, admit it, you guys thought I was a bitch, and I explained to most of you already.. I think.. But for those whom I have yet to give an explanation, here it goes.. As some of you have already known, I had a plain, dull childhood.. In primary school, I wasnt a really 'people-kind-of-person'.. Cause it was hard for me to trust people. Friends made use of me, and stuff.. of course I'm not in touch with them now.. Yeah.. or rather 'friends'.. So I guess I was a rather 'emo' lil kid.. I only had 2 or 3 close friends whom I trusted in primary 5 and 6.. I had low self esteem and stuff, and I'm serious okay.. That's like the past of soap that not many knew.. So different from now huhh.. Primary school days were terrible, I got pushed around, and stuff.. I was very soft spoken.. So it was really easy to push me around.. Then like idk, one day, I just couldn't take it anymore, I was sick of being the push over, I gained confidence, and stuff, and my whole outside look changed.. I was a mean person.. HAHA, sorry guys, I admit, I was really mean, when you guys tried to make friends with me.. HAHA, SORRY! So you guys know, when people tried to make friends, I'd show attitude and stuff.. And like after time, I'd loosen up, and you met the real soap. The retarded side.. The Soap everyone loves.. So like how does this link to the 'I HATE THAILAND' part? Well, Thailand is like a LDC (less developed country). In LDCs, some people are rather poor, and less well off.. So you'll see homeless people begging on the streets and stuff.. Like lil kids okay, so skinny, and pitiful, and some times old folks, and handicapped people, the sight really is too much for me.. I start to feel all compassionate and weak. I feel sorry for them. I dont wanna feel weak, and stuff, I don't want anyone to see the real soap, I think some parents at the singsiam saw it.. urh, I hate it, then they start the 'comforting mode' thangg.. I totally blew my cover.. I hate Thailand, cause it brings up my past.. Its not that I hate being nice.. I just don't want to be nice to the people I'm not close with.. I only wanna be nice around the people I'm really close with.. Honestly, idk..I hate myself.. Alot..

gave me your hand but realise I just wanna say goodbye,

I'm so sorry,

I Still Think

Andrew Is Hot <3

soap amplified; at 3:32 PM

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Heyy guys, read the news recently? The Thailand thangg.. Yeah, I'm like stuck here.. bloody mf protesters.. whatthecheebai mann.. I effing want to go home, I miss my friends, I miss my skateboard, I miss my guitars, I miss my cable teevee, I miss my radio, I miss my unlimited msn online time.. And, yes, of course I miss A.N.D.R.E.W. too.. really miss loads of things.. HAHA, honestly, I can go on and on..HAHA.. But, nahh, only got 1 hour to blog :( .. Well, I gotta go now.

I LOVE ANDREW <3

soap amplified; at 9:30 AM

Monday, November 24, 2008

Aye, ayee, guess whurddd, I'm like blogging in Thailand (: haha, I know, wth..HAHA. I didnt sail.. Just went there to support.. OHMYGEEZ, I just found out that guy sailors from SAFYC are damn bloody freaking BITCHY, yes, BITCHY to the core.. Mann, they bitch bout each other behind each other's back.. Anyways, I was kinda home sick, Duh, I did think of A.N.D.R.E.W.. HAHA. and , I dont wanna talk bout him anymore kayy.. Though, I did kinda miss him.. ANYWAYS, Freaking retarded, I totally pwned Wen and Gerald in guitar hero..HAHA, spastic.. Omgeez, bus rides were freaking chaotic.. Bitching with Joel Tay, teasing Javin, laughing with Dionious and Jun Le, HAHA, and singing A7X songs with Wen.. Im a way better singer, and guitarist, wai, thats guitarist, and guitar hero guitarist.. HAHA *ehem, EGO much..HAHA So, anyways, I'm only allowed half an hour on the freggin com, so, I guess I gotta go. so, Blog bout the rest later, or tmrw, AND Yes,

I STILL LIKE

ANDREW LEE..

shhhh! k? <3

soap amplified; at 8:09 PM

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I'm like at the airport now, haha, using the free com..HAHA, freaking retarded.. last minute blogging, before I board the plane.. mann, effing cold here.. shit, I'm starting to miss people already, I miss Andrew.. HAHA, he's so hot la, damn, wish I brought my bro's year book with me, HAHA. Then I can like laugh at Andrew's retarded, but cute face.. HAHA.. Miss my pee bee, I miss boobie, I miss cocky, I miss the cousins.. HAHA, i miss the guys at sailing, I miss my twin star, I MISS MY SKATE BOARD...DAMN.. HAHA, I MIS ANDREW..oops, I repeated that..HAHA, oh,oh, and I miss andrew (: haha. dont diee

soap amplified; at 4:38 PM

As quoted from the very first line of Avenged Sevenfold's Seize the Day, 'Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost,' well, I sure dont wanna die with regrets, so I guess imma go Carpe diem, or for you literature n00bs, seize the day. And the premenission nightmares, well. You wont be the one dying anymore,'I hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?' I know what I gotta do. And, I gotta save. But who's gona save me from me? Well I trust Jesus,'My god is mighty to save, He is mighty to save'

'So take me as you find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again'

Now I surrender..

God will be there he'll come to my rescue..

'My Whole Life
I Place In Your Hands
God Of Mercy
Humbled I Bow Down
In Your Presence At Your Throne'

But, If, IF I'm gone, 'just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain
Just smile back '
and that was Eminem, when I'm gone.

Save me from myself,
I'm going suicidal again,
this is not a song quote.
New soap's gona take control of soap.
But, then again, I guess
its okay..

cause I know the ones I love will be fine,

'Miles away from those I love purpose hard to find'

'Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold him when I'm not around,
when I'm much too far away'

okay, well guess thats all, bye dudes, and dudestresses, and maybe those in between, Christ be with you,

I LOVE ANDREW,

I'VE ALWAYS HAD,

AND, I NEVER STOPPED,

AND I NEVER WILL,

stop..

<3 the words are in black..

soap amplified; at 9:24 AM

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Damn, woahh.. phucking O levels are freggin overrrr! yeayyehh! So like straight after paper, I went home as usual.. Imma goodie two shoes, oh, Os ended on 13 Nov, last paper was bio (: Next day was Grad day, and prom, so went to do some last minute shopping.. HAHA, made friends with some tattoo people.

Grad day! aka, cocky's b'day, 14th nov! woke up like pretty early, got into my grad outfit.. HAHA, my grad outfit was hot okay.. I wore a freggin white tube bubble dress.. And some hot hoochie stiletto heels. Met cocky at 'bloody kotex' (its a code name).. And I had to run in heels cause we were running late.. sheesh.. So we finally arrived in school, and went to the auditorium, everyone was taking pictures and stuff, and thats when I come in.. HAHA, I got my Zacky Vengeance skull face mask, put it on, and went behind the people taking pics.. HAHa, So yeah, guess I'll be in lots of pics.. HAHA, mann, I totally look like the grim reaper.. damn..

After grad thingy, moo moo, her two friends and I went to her aunt's salon to do our hair.. I freaking wanted pink hair, but it ran out, so I decided to get lime green, but wtf, need to bleach, and too expensive.. So I decided to get PURPLE! Synyster Gates's favourite color! HAHA, It turnes out pinkish, purpleish, redish.. I guess it looks okay.. And I went straight home after that to change into prom dress.

Got into my rockin prom dress, and headed to Marina Mandrin Hotel. Moo Moo picked me up from the hotel lobby, and we went to her room. HAHA, I did my black parade eyes..whoo! totally went mafia! Soon after, cock, toria, and the rest came. We got changed, and went to get early bird prize..HAHA.. We're freggin cheapscape, I know.. HAHA. We were running up and down the hotel.. Oh, and I took off my bra, cause toria told me to go braless with her.. So like, as I was running (in heels too),my tube dress slipped down a lil, and my boobs spilled out.. HAHA, right infront of toria, but no one saw! phew! When prom was about to start, we went down, Oh,oh! Guess what! Andrew was at prom! HAHA, yeah right, as if.. HAHA, but no seriously, Andrew was there..HAHA, not the hot ANDREW haha.. Yeah, our waiter at our table was Andrew.. A guy named andrew..HAHAHA wth la.. and I think I'm too lazy to blog bout prom alr, I wanna play my guitar hero world tour, so sorry guys, haha, maybe will blog bout it tmrw.

I LIKE ANDREW <3

soap amplified; at 9:38 PM

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Damn, got CLB paper later, like at 2pm..haha.. But its just listening compre so I guess its okay.. Mann, still got dreams.. Honestly, I hate dreams.. I learn I biology, that dreams make you feel really tired, and lethargic the next day, and its so true.. Even if you slept at 6pm.. Trust me, I tried it.. Mann, I didn't used to dream every single day..before my nightmares, I'd only dream like once or twice a week.. And I didn't used to be so lethargic and dead.. I know, you might think that its due to exam stress, but, I know its so not.. I've been 'mugging' at the very same pace the whole year.. So yeah.. And the real deal bout the dreams is that its coincidentally similar, and linked to one another. Like, the same people, or rather PERSON keeps appearing.. Idk, whats with the dreams, but its really sucking the life outta me.. I don't wanna see a councillor.. I've had enough of that last year.. Anyways, I did some research on dreams, not the 'spiritual' type, but the LOGICAL, SCIENTIFIC kind.. So like, straight after waking up, I gotta write out my whole dream down.. Write it down on a piece of paper.. Then like, I'm supposed to read through it, and analyze it. Think of the dreams, and what it might portraying in my real life.. Mann, I tried, and although I'm kinda one of the *ehem*ehem, intellectual people, I still cant figure it out.. Maybe Someone else should analyze it for me.. Idk.

So aside from my dreams.. Oh mann! A.N.D.R.E.W. came online last night. <3 HAHA, he told me he dreamt that he was a 'rock star' on stage performing, with a gold lp.. And smoking.. As in really smoking, smoking.. Then he threw..ok, never mind.. I shan't go on.. Lil kiddies view my blog too okay.. HAHA, no offence bout the lil kiddies part (: Hmm, gold lp? Is it just a gold lp? Well, it better not be the Slash lp sig. goldtop..Cause that might be a lil too coincidental.. Except for the 'shirt' part.. And that I was just holding the guitar, not playing it.. Cause I do lead vocals.. That dream was like last month or something..haha.. And, and, I was on tour with Hey Monday.. As in I dreamt that B.A.A. was on tour with Hey Monday! how cool was that.. Oh, And I had another dream, last time, that I was at an A7X concert, and then M Shads got me up on stage, and we did a song..aww.. Anyways I did more sopiDA VINCI codes (: I just love doing all these codes, there's the suspense, and tension.. Oh, and wanna know something cooler? this whole blog is a sopiDA VINVI code.. *BLACK IS ALWAYS THE BOLDEST COLOR EVEN WHEN IT APPEARS INVISIBLE* that's all the hint I'm giving (:

Oh, and if A.N.D.R.E.W. ever smokes or gets a tattoo, mann, idk.. Maybe I'm fine with the tattoo part, but smoking, sweetie, I really don't know.. But I hope not.. Cause everyone knows, I'm allergic to smoke, like, I cant stop sneezing.. Yeah.. sad huh.. ahh, whattheheck,

<3 I THINK ANDREW IS STILL HOT.

And most probably still have a

ginormous crush on him..

once again, Da Vinci's still in my blog

oh, and notice the guitar designs? Pete Wentz had the design on his bass first.. And its really LV, Zacky's guitar may appear similar, but its not LV, its ZV.. AND, and! Its WAY cooler than Pete Wentz's bass.. HAHA, okay people focus on the guitars! Not the spastic looking Pete..HAHA, or the bald, fat Zacky V..HAHAHA

soap amplified; at 7:33 AM

Sunday, November 9, 2008

So, uhm, 6 November was a special day? hmm, well, from what I know, its supposed, but, I didn't seem one bit happy.. Everyone wasn't around, friends had to study.. So it was freaking lonesome, in other words, YES. My day sucked.. Not just any freaking day, my birthday, sure, I got smses, and birthday wishes, but still.. hurr... so anyways, at least i got a cool rockin cake..

So anyways, like, forget about my stupid birthday.. Oh, oh, great news, I didn't sleep for 2 days, and uhm , my nightmares have stopped, but, I still dream of A.N.D.R.E.W. like wth..Idk, He just seems to keep haunting me in my dreams.. Its not like a bad thing or anything, honestly, I just see him in my dreams.. he just happens to appear in my dreams.. kinda freaky..

Oh, I went shopping with cocky yesterday, shopping for prom shoes.. went to Bugis to get cock's shoes.. Then, we went to town to get my stuff, HAHA, we were walking up and down town, we got no life..HAHA, uhm, has lunch at cineleasure, then we went to far east to get my skull face. We walked the entire mall to look for my shoes..haha freaking disappointing. I kinda had my eye on one pair of shoes, they were expensive, but I didnt care..haha.. But the thing was, they only had one phucking pair..gross.. Then, we continued searching.. Found a similar looking pair, and it was like 5 bucks only! But it was too good to be true. Only one size left.. phuck it. So l finally agreed to get open toed heels.. haha, they were green..

Finally bought them, and went home, oh! On our bus ride home, Cocky and I totally camwhored our butts off..HAHA.. Freaking retarded.. here are the pics (:

So yeah, we got off the bus and headed home, I was gona be home alone that night, so like Cock went home to freshen up and stuff, then she came over.. We watched a lil of cheeta girls, then we went on the com, and started viewing random friendster profiles of gross people.. HAHA.. Freaking retarded, then we checked out blogs..haha.. oh mann! I love Arsenal! phuck Man U! I hate Man U, but I hate Liverpool more..(: but I know who I might <3...

I <3 ANDREW..

I think..

soap amplified; at 11:32 AM

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Still cant sleep. Stupid nightmare yesterday night caused me to be traumatized, and now I just cant seem to sleep. So last light, watched a little bit of desperate housewives, and amazing race, I kinda felt sleepy, so I did my regular night prayer, and then tried to sleep. I freaking kept tossing and turning.. I just couldn't sleep, phuck it. So I finally got some shut eye at 2.00 am + And like, wtf, when I fell a sleep, I had nightmares again, yes, about HIM again.. This time, no Margret, Phucking worse nightmare, A.N.D.R.E.W. was gone, as in seriously gone, like phuck, and I mean gone as in seriously forever gone, no more in this world, and right now, as I'm typing this down, I'm starting to tear..So yes, in my dreams, when he was gone, I cried like wth again. No, I seemed to cry more, I don't wanna type the whole dream out again, cause I don't think he should know what happened in my dream. So anyways, again I talked to God. Thank goodness I was just a horrible dream. But, when I woke up, I thought of my dream, and like I cried as in really cried, phuck, I know I was awake, I really cried, I know I did. I even remember the time it was around 6.35 am.. And I couldn't go back to sleep.. So I started thinking to myself, what if, just WHAT IF, A.N.D.R.E.W. was really gone? Wtf will I do? So I did some thinking, and, I know what I will do. I KNOW WHAT I'LL DO. I know it'll be very stupid of me to do that, but, I've made up my mind, I know what I'll do. Whatever I decide, I wont back down. I don't think persuasion would work.

Dear God, the only thing I ask of you
is to hold him when I not around,
when I'm much too far away.
Please God, I really really like him alot.

I think I really like

Andrew <3

So like anyways,aside from my nightmares, I guess you noticed I stopped using the word freaking in my post? Yeah, well, I gotta stop saying freaking, cause, in my papers, I kept writing freaking, in social studied paper, I wrote freaking in my answers like 8 or 9 times. And yes, of course I striked them out..

soap amplified; at 10:12 AM

Monday, November 3, 2008

ok, uhh, I know its the same day, and I'm back here again..And If I wanted to add stuff about my day in my post, I can just click 'edit post' .

uhh, well, I'm too lazy for that.. So anyways, PHUCKKK! Last night I had a phucking nightmare.. Phuck it mann, scared the shit out of me.. And the last thing I recall before waking up, was that I was praying to God, asking him for help.. Ok,ok, so here's what I recall of the nightmare.. It started with some party scene.. My party I guess? No, not sweet sixteen.. Just some lame primary school kid kinda party.. IDK where it was at though.. but I think there was this Malay girl.. I think I recognise her or something.. she was about, uhh..9? or 10? A.N.D.R.E.W. was there too.. I was trying to talk to A.N.D.R.E.W. but some how, I just couldn't.. So like the lil girl knew I wanted to talk to him, so she helped me.. She and her other friends.. Then like I went looking for them, and met my brother instead.. My bro like showed me some pieces of torn paper.. And I supposed the lil girls tore it up.. I put them together, and it was actually a note from A.N.D.R.E.W. .. I cant remember the exact words, but it said something like, 'the only person I love is Margret..' something like that.. then there was this drawn heart, and inside was 'A+M' which I think stands for A.N.D.R.E.W. + Margret.. And like after reading that, I just cried like I never cried before.. mann, it seriously scared the shit outta me.. like phuck.. I just started to think of the song, teardrops on my guitar.. Cause I WAS crying.. over A.N.D.R.E.W. , like the D.R.E.W. from teardrops on my guitar.. yeah it was just horrible, even though it was just a dream, I could feel my heart aching, and it felt shattered.. Like, I really really could feel my heart.. So I think I started to pray to God.. Asking for help.. I was really scared.. And just like that, I woke up. God, you tha man. Jesus is just so awesome.. Oh, when I woke up, I found myself breathing really heavily, and my heart was beating really fast.. mann.. Well, of course, I was thankful that it was all just a dream.. so yeah.. that's my nightmare..

I REALLY REALLY LIKE

ANDREW LEE <3

soap amplified; at 9:33 AM

mann, I didnt come here yesterday, okay, so anyways, hung out with my childhood, long time friend, Venessa..again..HAHA, hmm, I seem to be hanging out with her more oftent nowadays.. And I'm lovin it, cause we do nothing, but have FUN FUN FUN! HAHA. We went to the night safari, for some uhh, halloween thang.. Honestly, I didnt know what to wear, I just returned the Synyster Gates outfit to my dear Fann.. HAHA, and my nun outfit is on the otherside.. So like, in the end, I decided to go as Spongebob! mann I phucking look like him! We were like twins! HAHA..I brought bobby (spongebob) along..HAHA, bobby kinda protected me from the not-scary-monsters/ghost..HAHA, when the monsters tried to scare us, I'd whack them with bobby..haha, thanks bobby! Venessa dressed up as a doll ghost..looked kinda scary..HAHA..

Oh,oh! btw, I have an awsomely shocking news! I HAVE A TWIN! Not just any twin, a twin star.. cool huh.. Kazi Superstar is like so my twin..Damn..haha. Oh, and if you dont get why we're twin stars.. Its simple.. He's a SUPERSTAR, and I'm a ROCKSTAR.. stars? yeahh.. Do the math.

soap amplified; at 9:16 AM